Lonely on Mother’s Day?
This Mother’s Day, while everyone is being treated to breakfast in bed, I see the anguish of the single mom who doesn’t get help on any Sunday much less the 2nd one in May. I see the overwhelming tiredness of the brand new mom who feels like she should be overjoyed on her first Mother’s Day but secretly longs for a break from the baby and 4 uninterrupted hours of sleep. I see the empty nester who has realized her own daughters are mothers now and this holiday is as much their day as it is hers.
I see the mother who still doesn’t know how to answer the question “how many children do you have?” because one of the fruit of her womb is in Heaven. It stabs her heart that she will never get a Mother’s Day card from him. You don’t think I hear the sorrow echoing in your voice or see the half smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes, but I do. I see it and I’m sorry.
You, in my mom’s group, who will be spending her first Mother’s Day as a motherless child. And you, friend for life, who has always felt like a motherless child. I see you at the preschool who’s eyes shined over when saying that it was just too far to travel to see her mom. I see you, my own mother, who has spent countless Mother’s Days away from her three girls and 12 grandchildren because distance proves a worthy adversary.
[In case you don’t get a Mother’s Day card, here’s what your kids would write in one to you…if they could.]
I see all the birth mothers and step mothers and aunts-who-are-like-mothers who don’t get the attention a mother deserves and feel left out and alone. I see the would-be moms who just aren’t moms yet despite the trials and tragedies they have endured to be one. I see the moms who are lonely and sad and disappointed and hurt and my heart is aching for you on Mother’s Day.
To the lonely on Mother’s Day, please know you are not alone. Please know your pain is not going unnoticed. Please know you have an ally praying for you. Please know it won’t always be this way. Your pain won’t always be this fresh. Your sadness won’t always be just under the surface.
And for this Mother’s Day, while you wade through the muck of your feelings, know that God loves you. And whether you can feel it or not, He is carrying you. Be good to yourself this Mother’s Day. Buy your own damn present. Take yourself out to brunch. And just when you think no one knows the ache in your heart that is hiding behind your smile, know that I do. Know that I’m rooting for you.
Happy Mother’s Day.